Dating is a game—a sentimental one, that is. As in every game, only those who know the rules will eventually win. Don’t hate the player, hate the game, they usually say. I’m referring to the 7, 8, 9 rule. Most guys use a scale of 1 to 10 to “rate” a girl or to describe her to someone else. It’s shallow and superficial, of course, but tries looking at it in a different way. It’s a sliding scale that differs for each guy. Guys see it like this: A 7 is a girl they would take home for a night; an 8 is a girl they would date and introduce to friends; and a 9 is a girl they would take home to meet the family. In this game, no one is a 10, for a ten (10) might be someone a guy feels lucky just to be around.
One man’s 10 is someone else’s 9; the scale is subjective. Have you ever said to a friend, “what does he see in her?” Well, your 6 may be his 8? Everyone has a different perspective. These numbers aren’t based on your looks alone—unless he hasn’t had a chance to talk to you. Your personality and how you are perceived are important factors as well.
By changing a man’s impression, you can change where he places you on his scale. This is why it’s important to always be the best you can be. You always want to be your man’s 9. Your stock can rise in a man’s eyes if you take this advice to heart and follow these principles. The elasticity of this scale is what makes the Tough Love boot camp work.
Note: Gyna Jean-Pierre is a creative writer. She is the author of several essays on women in the Caribbean. She lives in Ponte Vedra, Florida.